Boy-girl relationships (BGRs) are confusing - not taught in school, and may not even be taught by parents. Sometimes we simply emulate how our parents act, or perhaps other adults, including those in TV series. This book was able to capture many useful pointers on what to look out for, how to react, and when to do what.
Content: This book takes the viewpoints of both men and women, on how the 2 interact with each other, react to situations and express themselves - they speak 2 different languages, as Gray put it. Many conflicts arise out of miscommunication, which this book will help to reduce. Note that this book is a general guide, it is unlikely that everything will be relatable so take it with a pinch of salt and sieve out the good parts for yourself.
Estimated reading time needed: 12-15h but I recommend taking your time to do so. Relate the info to your experiences if you can, it will help greatly.
Key takeaways:
1) Men are like rubber bands - after giving lots of love, they need space to "bounce back" and start giving lots of love again. They do this by going back to their "cave", and it is best for women to understand this and let him be alone for the time being.
2) Women are like waves - their emotions rise and fall, and are sometimes affected by things of the past, which men would think have already been resolved. During this period, it is best for men to understand her emotions and validate them, let her know she's been heard.
3) Men and women speak 2 languages, and how messages are delivered may be more important than the message itself.
4) Both sexes score points differently. Men score points based on how big the event is, and women score points based on the number of times. For example, men think that by working hard and earning a better salary, they earn 5 points. However, women would only assign 1 point. Men would then think they scored 5 points when they actually only scored 1, creating a difference in expectations/perception.
5) Women on Venus tend to help each other without asking, whereas men on Mars want to feel validated and be trusted to solve problems, so they tend to not ask for help. Men thus assume that if women want help, they'll ask for it, when in reality, women want them to help without asking.
Recommendation: This book was filled with anecdotes and interesting situations which we may relate to. If you're struggling to understand the opposite sex, or if you think you're not struggling but somehow always quarrels with the opposite sex, this book is for you. Definitely check it out to manage relationships - not just BGRs, but in general.
